Remember that guy you met months ago and who had clearly no interest in you but you told him your feelings anyway? Just so that you could say you tried?
He texted again. After more than half a year!
You think: “What does that ass want?”
You’re reluctant to even answer the text.
But your curiosity is winning over logic. And you vowed to yourself to never do anything without logic again because that one lapse in judgement has been embarrassing enough. (Remember? When you told you liked him.)
You never learn do you?
Your carefully worded text answers his after hours of contemplating. Contemplating over the question whether you should or shouldn’t.
But you did and are now anxiously waiting for HIS reply. Will he reply? Was he making a fool out you?
But there is the ping signaling a new message.
And you think: “It’s gotta be from someone else. XY hasn’t texted yet today!”
But it’s him.
Big surprise there!
He could still fool you. Make fun of you. Call you easy.
Opening that text will be like opening the box with Schroedinger’s cat inside.
Is it dead or alive?
Is he nice or mean.
Admit it. You put your bets on the latter.
You just love them so very bad. Makes life interesting you tell yourself.
You read the text.
And read it again.
Then you check for signs of him being drunk.
Even if there were: In vinum veritas!
His first words:
“I’m sorry. I miss you.”
And you think:
What is there to miss? How can you miss something you never had?
And then you ask yourself:
A very good question. And difficult to answer. Very difficult even.
You decide to pry further into the reason he texted you. There has to be more to it than just his supposedly missing you.
Small talk. Dutifully ignoring his request to meet again.
(Because you’re literally a world apart. Duh!)
More small talk.
You slowly get the hang of flirting while not flirting at all.
Still ignoring that request to meet up.
(How are you even supposed to do that?!)
He’s at the place where you met the first time.
Memories take you back to that time. That place.
But instead of remembering why you liked him you remember that really cute other guy who would always make you breakfast.
And that girl you’re still texting with everyday. She became your best friend. Even if she’s not with you bodily. She is there for you when you need her (and time difference isn’t getting in the way).
And you remember you haven’t asked her about her day yet.
You should do so now. Not text that god awful guy.
You do that.
And even text that cute breakfast guy. He’s in Italy now! And will go to your country next year.
That sound and the feeling of your phone vibrating reminds you that there is still THAT guy on the other side of the screen.
He tells you again that he’s so very sorry for hurting you.
And he wants to make an effort to make up for that. He says.
And you think:
I don’t believe you.
You play along because you want to make sure you are right.
(Because you are. Duh!)
You agree that HE has to make an effort.
HE has to start gaining your trust from the bottom. Start at zero – zilch, nix, nada.
You end the conversation for the day because he goes to bed after partying.
(Aha! He must be a phenomenal drunk texter!)
Next day you think:
Let’s give him a chance.
YOU text him first.
And leave it at that.
After coming home from work that day you look at your phone and the messages ping up.
(You live in the 19th century because you don’t have data.)
He has answered. With one sentence.
And you never expect a text again.
You are right.
Years later HE texts again.
Same blurry reason.
But this time you give him a piece of your mind!
And delete his contact.
You don’t have time for good-for-nothing assholes.